raw

I often post photos of my children full of joy and embracing their life but anyone who is a parent or anyone around children enough knows that simply isn't the whole picture. I am trying to open up and to tell my whole story and capture it all. Some of my recent portrait posts have showed that. Today has been a day full of fussing and bickering, endless runny noses, my booming mom voice ringing in their ears and a battle at every turn. My patience is dwindling and I am searching for a quiet place to catch my breath. And then through the dark cloud their laughter breaks through and fills my heart. It only lasts a moment before they begin bickering again but it's there and I hold on to it. The story of my life as a mother truly does have messes and tears, mistakes and heartache. Like any parent the laughter, discovery, love and fleeting moments of childhood are the wings that keep parenthood soaring. Some days I can't see the light and that's okay. We are all growing together and I know I am not alone. I am grateful for all of it. The raw moments are part of our story. Real emotion happy or sad captivate all of us to feel something. I like to keep it light, I'll always fight for joy but today this is us. Today our story is a rollercoaster and we are teetering between all emotions until bedtime.

I've been called mean today and  been told go away. I've been screamed at and wiped tears from all three of them. I've also been hugged and kissed. It's real life and it's worth it. I am not perfect and they are not perfect but we do unconditionally love each other. That's a story worth telling.